How to disagree in English
Alex Case
Despite being in every dictionary and many English courses, the word “disagree” in “I disagree” is famously very rare in everyday English. This article reviews more common and useful ways of disagreeing, including both soft/ polite phrases and stronger/ more direct disagreeing language.
Disagreeing politely/ softly
Tactics for making disagreement less direct and less argumentative include:
- leading up to disagreement with something positive (“That’s a good point, but…”, “While I can see what you mean,…”, “I agree up to a point. However,…”, “I agreed with what you said right up to…”)
- leading up to disagreement with something humble (“I haven’t read much about this topic, but…”, “While you obviously know more about this than me,…”)
- showing that your disagreement is just another point of view (“For me,…”, “If we look at it from the perspective of…”
- regretting your disagreement (“While it pains me to disagree with you,…”, “I wish that were the case, but…”)
- expressing how agreement would be possible (“I would definitely feel the same way if…”, “I could agree with that if it were the case that…”)
- using softening/ hedging words like “slightly” and “not really” (“I have a slightly different point of view”, “That’s not really how I see it”)
- using questions instead of statements (“But wouldn’t you also say that…?”)
- comparing different arguments (“While that is a strong argument,…”, “I’d be more inclined to agree with…”)
You can also kind of warn the other person that a strong opinion is coming with phrases like “To be honest” and “Frankly speaking”.
There is another whole article on this site with more details on each way of disagreeing more politely.
Disagreeing strongly/ directly
Perhaps the most obvious way to disagree more strongly is to add stronger words like “totally”, as in:
- I don’t agree at all.
- I strongly disagree.
- I totally disagree.
- I really don’t think so.
- That’s totally wrong.
- That’s just/ simply/ clearly not true.
You can also change words to stronger words, as in “don’t” changing to “can’t” in “I can’t agree” and “I can’t accept that”.
Similar uses of strong words but without related short phrases include:
- That makes no sense (to me).
- I have the opposite opinion.
- There is no way (on earth) that…
- Quite the opposite! …
- That is far from true.
- I’ve never heard such rubbish/ nonsense!
There are also shorter and even stronger ones like:
- Nonsense!
- Ridiculous!
- Rubbish!
- No way!
- Absolutely not.
Although questions are suggested above as a way of softening disagreement, there are also strong disagreement questions like:
- You don’t really think that, do you?
- Are you honestly/ seriously saying…?
- Are you out of your mind?
- Are you pulling my leg?
- Does anyone (seriously) think that nowadays?
- Are you having a laugh?
- Are you having me on?
- Are you on something?
- Do you genuinely believe that?
- Seriously?
- That’s a joke, right?
- You think?
- In what way does… make sense?
- What are you talking about?
Some of those treat the other person’s opinion as if it is humour, as also seen in:
- You must be joking.
- You cannot be serious.
- You’ve got to be kidding.
Similarly, we can express shock in strong disagreement phrases like:
- I’m surprised that you would say that.
- I’m sure you’re (just) saying that to shock me.
- I can’t believe you are really saying that.
- You can’t say that!
- It doesn’t seem possible that you could really think that…
Some phrases suggest that a different reality is needed for their opinion to be true, as in:
- You wish!
- In your dreams!
These sometimes have an ironic tone of voice that can be seen in more obviously sarcastic strong phrases like:
- Yeah, right!
- Oh, absolutely!
More logical/ rational strong disagreeing phrases include:
- I can’t see any (possible) reason why…
- It has been proven that…
- That can’t possibly be the case.
- I completely fail to see the logic in…
- That is a fallacy.
- That is an old wives’ tale.
- That’s a dangerous argument that could lead to…
- That’s a facetious argument.
- The first of many problems with that argument is…
- You’ve got (totally) the wrong end of the stick.
- Your argument is full of holes. For example,…
- The inherent contradiction in that argument is…
- You’ve fallen into the logical trap of…
Interrupting phrases can also sometimes be used for strong disagreement, as in:
- (You may as well) stop right there.
- I’ve heard enough.